Scheißwetter in November? Ha! In Texas, even the rain comes with fireworks. That’s the thing, Leute – Texas don’t do anything half-sized. It’s either blazing sun, or thunderstorms that make a Bavarian spring shower look like kindergarten with a watering can.
Texas Size, Bavarian Eyes
So, what’s the best about Texas? Easy: it’s BIG. Die Weite – the space. In Bavaria if you drive 30 minutes, you’re in another village with three cows and a bakery that closes at noon. Here in Texas, drive 30 minutes and you’re still not past the same honky-tonk and Buc-ee’s billboard. The place just keeps going. You can stretch your arms out and still have room for a BBQ pit, a football field, and your cousin’s lifted Dodge Ram.
Cowboys vs. Lederhos’n
Another thing: Football. Texans take Friday night lights more serious than Bavarians take Oktoberfest. Imagine if half of Munich built a stadium just for high school? Here that’s normal. Back home a fussball club might have a patch of grass and a rusty goalpost. But Texas? Neon lights, marching bands, fireworks! It’s Bierfest with shoulder pads.
And Cowboys – Ja, sure, in Bavaria we also wear funny pants (lederhos’n). But in Texas the cowboy boots ain’t for show. They’re for mud, rattlesnakes, and kicking that stubborn pickup door shut when it sticks again.
Brewkraut’s Box
What’s the deal:
- Wide open roads and skies that make you feel godlike.
- Friendly folks who call you “partner” even if you just spilled brisket juice on your shirt.
- Sunsets so colorful they’d make a Bavarian painter throw his brush away.
What’s nonsense:
- 110° heat in July, mein Gott… no man needs that.
- Driving half a day just to reach “the next town.”
- Sweet iced tea so sugary your dentist retires early.
Prost-finale:
Texas isn’t about comfort – it’s about pride. If you can’t handle the heat, the size, or the noise, then go back to your cuckoo clock. Jawoll.
BBQ Smoke vs. Bier Steam
The soul of Texas is BBQ. And listen, as a brewmaster I know smoke and fire. In Bavaria we play with malt steam – nice, cozy – but here? They slow-smoke a brisket for 18 hours like they’re baptizing it into meat heaven. You taste that and suddenly sauerkraut seems like rabbit food. Mix it with a cold Märzenbier and you’ll hear angels yodeling.
The People, Servus Y’all
Don’t forget the people. Texans are blunt, but warm-hearted. Like Bavarians, just with bigger hats. They’ll offer you a beer, a plate, and a story you ain’t sure is true. And that’s beautiful. ‘Cause in the end, the best about Texas is not just the wide land or the BBQ pits – it’s the feeling that you can be a bit wild, a bit dusty, and nobody cares as long as you smile when you say “Howdy.”
So what’s the best about Texas? Simple: it makes Bavaria feel small, but in a way that makes me Prost real loud. Now quit asking, grab a brisket sandwich, and watch the sun paint the sky like a drunk artist with too much paprika rub.
